So let me start with a definition:
 |
| My copy with crucial post-it markers |
Whoa. Yep, I just started this off all nice and technical on you, didn't I? It's okay, that's why this blog is here. Because most of the reliable resources out there are complex and hard to understand. I'd like to bridge the gap between the two. Complex Research + Reality = this blog. So here we go, basically a TCK is someone whose parents are from one place, let's call that "home base", but who has lived in another place, "host country", and has then developed their own third culture; hence the name. Interestingly enough, no matter what the TCK's home bases or host countries are, TCKs have demonstrated similar attributes across the board.
"A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental years outside the parents' culture. The TCK builds relationships to all of the cultures, while not having full ownership in any. Although elements from each culture are assimilated into the TCK's life experience, the sense of belonging is in relationship to others of similar background."
I'll try to unlock some of those attributes and show you how they show up in real life situations as we journey through this whole blog process, but let me start by telling you something I can't stress enough, and I say this to TCKs, to their parents, to their teachers, to their friends:
 |
| TCKs are masters at blending in |
Third Culture Kids are their own culture.
That means that even if they look like they fit in one culture, or they sound like they are from another culture, they are their own culture. It means that as you interact with them, if you are not from their culture, you will have difficulties. It means, as a parent, if you are not a TCK, your child is really different from you. The moment you understand this the better off you will be, as a TCK, as a teacher of a TCK, as a parent of a TCK, as a friend of a TCK.
Imagine that you are an American who goes to Malawi, it would be ludicrous for you to try to interact with a Malawian as if they were an American or for them to interact with you as if you were Malawian. And not only would it be ridiculous but it would be hard to communicate and understand each other, and probably someone would get frustrated or offended. This applies to the TCK. While they may respond as if they are the same, they are adapting but not uniform.
A friend of mine, Sarah Malak, recently got to travel to both her parents' home countries, Lebanon and Russia. She lives in Egypt normally and she said these trips had interesting interactions:
"In Lebanon, I got to interact with Syrians and Lebanese, and every single person I met thought I was American, and I have no idea why. In Russia, I guess people thought I was Russian, but I think they noticed that my language doesn't come out as smoothly as theirs..."Her experiences were unique because not only did people realize she was different but she knows she is different, even though she may look, sound, or even act the same. Her rusty Russian got them out of a ticket though. Good for you, Sarah!
I currently live in the United States and the most ghastly reaction I get to my TCKness is always when I talk to my peers about TV shows they grew up on. The conversation usually goes like this:
"You know that episode of (insert American 80's TV show, eg: Full House, Saved by the Bell, Home Improvement, Fresh Prince of Bell Air... etc.) where..."
"I've never seen that show (or) I've only seen one or two episodes."
"WHAT? How did you not watch that show?" looking at me skeptically.
"I didn't grow up in America."
"Oh, right..."
And suddenly I am different, which I knew, but now they know too. But this blog is all about embracing that difference, because while TCKs are different, we as TCKs are also the same. And if you don't believe me, put a bunch of them in a room together. Instant friends. I love that.
 |
| Just like this lovely diverse group photo I found on Huffington Post |
No comments:
Post a Comment